PODCAST EPISODE № 36

3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear

by Anita Charlot

Listen to 3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear:

No matter where you are in your life, there is something that you are not doing because of fear.

Whether it’s fear of starting your own business, fear of changing your hairstyle, fear of asking for a raise or promotion, fear of raising your prices, fear of leaving your corporate job, fear of leaving an abusive marriage, or maybe fear of trusting again after heartbreak, everyone has fear.

How you handle that fear will determine your quality of life.

Join me inside this episode as I share with you a few personal stories of when I stepped out in front of fear and three ways that you can use to step out in front of fear and find the courage to live the life you’ve always wanted.

See you inside the episode!

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What You Learn:

Why it’s important to step out in front of fear and what you can accomplish when you do
My best tips and tricks for stepping out in front of fear
How visualization plays a key role in this process
The danger of staying behind fear and not overcoming

Featured on the Show:

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Episode Transcript

Hey there beautiful!

As I was preparing for today’s podcast, I started reviewing the past couple of weeks in my life. In January, I attended a retreat for women in Vegas, which genuinely blessed my soul. The love support and transformation of the women in the room was absolutely amazing.

Then on the 17th and 18th of February, I was a speaker at the Flourish Media Conference, a conference created by two women of color that raises $15 million dollars every year to invest in women-owned businesses.

There’s something about being in a room full of multimillionaires that look just like you and are there to see your flourish as well.

I spend quite a bit of my time pouring into other women. So it is always a special treat when I can be in a room of women that could pour into me. This year did not disappoint. I walked away with many notes, new connections, collaboration opportunities, and a list of podcast guests to share with you during our candid conversation episodes.

I listened as the women and men on the panel shared their journeys, their ups and downs, their advice to up-and-coming business owners, and how they were fearful initially, but stepped out in front of the fear and did it anyway.

It reminded me of when I first stepped out of my comfort zone and gathered several of my journal entries that I had written as I was trying to process my pain for my divorce. I knew that other women had experienced the pain of walking away from an abusive marriage, the disappointment, the confusion, embarrassment, and the loss of faith and love. I was encouraged by my girlfriend at the time to put them together in a book, and so I did.

Girl, I was terrified!

These are my personal feelings my pain that I was putting in print in black and white for others to read. I was worried, like, I was afraid. Would they judge me? Would they laugh at me? Would they call me stupid? Would they point at me when they saw me in public? Would they inflict more pain by minimizing the pain that I had experienced?

There was a strong need for me to share so that other women knew that they were not alone.

I couldn’t be the only one experiencing these feelings, but I may have been the only one defiant enough at that time to share publicly.

At that point, I didn’t care. I just needed to share. I needed to reach you, the woman that was suffering in silence as I had for so long.

And so I stepped out in front of the fear, and I did it anyway.

I was shocked at the level of support I received, the number of people who showed up to the open mic nights and then came up to me afterward to purchase a copy of the book, the hope I had when printing the pages on my own, stapling the covers, adding the tassels, and reaching the reader’s hearts was manifesting right in front of my eyes.

I was even encouraged to enter a poetry contest with my most famous piece, which was honestly an F you letter to my husband or my ex-husband. I chose this one because it allowed me to share with all of the feels, all of the emotions, and all of the anger that I would have loved to have exhibited if I had been strong enough to share with him at the time of the abuse.

Maybe he would have thought twice before putting his hands on me, maybe not.

I was up against some pretty famous poets on the scene, but the pain allowed me to handle my own. Imagine my surprise when I took third place all because I stepped out in front of fear.

This was the first and the last book of poetry I ever wrote, and I refer to it as my book of anger poetry. You won’t find it anywhere, as I have the last copy since it was self-published, and bound by hand.

Will I ever publish it again? I have no intention to, but it is a beautiful reminder of what is possible when you step out in front of fear.

I’m gonna keep repeating that: when you step out in front of fear.

There were other areas of my life where I stepped out in front of fear and triumphed as well. Not without a few bumps and bruises along the way, but I did it, and I would do it all over again.

Like when I opened up about what was going on in my abusive marriage to my military family: they were so supportive and staged an intervention before a show was created by the same name. They gave me the love and support I needed to leave that marriage, they helped me devise a plan reminded me of the woman I was before entering that marriage, took off work, helped me move into the new place, and slowly loved me through my healing.

Would I have left had I not shared with them? What if I had allowed the fear of judgment to stop me from letting them know what I was going through when I didn’t feel like I could talk to anyone else? What would have become of me? Would I be here sharing with you today? Who knows?

What I do know is that every time I’ve stepped out in front of fear, it has worked in my favor.

My business coach reminds me that when you trust God, step out in faith, what you don’t know how to do, or where you will find the strength, the money, the courage, the provisions, God will fill in the gaps.

And you know what He did, then, and He still does now.

Sometimes I still get paralyzed by fear and forget who and whose I am. And once I have worn myself out, trying to figure out how to do it all on my own, and just let go and let God and my support system be there, for me, it always works out.

I could go on and on about the results of stepping out in front of fear in my life, but today, I will share three ways you can do it on your own. You can use all three of these things, or you can pick and choose those that resonate with your spirit, and whether that’s one, two, or all three. It’s totally your choice. Just know that I have used all of these at some point in my life.

I hope that they will bless you and yours. You will be able to do some of these things on your own and others you may need support with. If you need that support, just send me a message through my website, and I will be happy to help.

So the first one is: write it out.

Whenever you’re going through something and whenever you’re worried about something I need you to write out What is the worst thing that can happen? And then after that, on the next line, write: Then what? And then what?

So keep asking that question until you can’t answer it anymore, you will most likely figure out that the world will not end and that there is always a solution. But putting pen to paper and focusing on writing those things out helps you to get it out of your head onto the paper where you can actually see what’s possible for you.

Number two: identify the lesson.

Consider the lesson instead of looking at your current situation as a failure, a problem or a situation that you can never bounce back from. There’s always a lesson.

Think about something that happened. What did that do to you? How did it change you? What will you do differently next time? What did it teach you about people or business or planning? Maybe about being clear on what you wanted? What did it teach you about, you know, reading between the lines or identifying red flags? There is always a lesson!

And then number three: practice visualizing yourself doing what you are afraid to do and Your mind’s eye. Rehearse every detail.

So Michael Jordan and Michael Phelps, two Michael’s. You know what they’re famous for: Michael Jordan, the basketball player, Michael Phelps, the US Olympic gold medalist. They both practice doing their sport in their mind over and over again. Michael Jordan imagined himself making the game-winning shot long before he stepped onto the basketball court. And Michael Phelps saw himself swimming and winning the race. He saw his breathing technique, he saw himself doing the strokes, he rehearsed it.

So when he got to the water, and when Michael Jordan stepped up, you know, to the basket, they knew like it was like muscle memory, right? They had practiced so much in their mind that it just it was just natural, it was a natural flow.

So if you do this in your own life, or those things that you are fearful for, then you too can do it from muscle memory.

I used visualization techniques to attract my current husband, but I’ll share that story with you in another episode.

The three ways I shared with you are very simple in concept, but they can be challenging to believe that they will work at all or/and challenging to execute.

Why? Because of fear!

Fear will paralyze you, and it will cause you to engage in self-sabotaging behaviors. It will keep you in your current place of discomfort. Why? Because it’s familiar.

To be honest with you, I struggle with overcoming fear often, but it’s like a muscle. The more I practice stepping out in front of fear, the easier it gets.

It also helps to stay connected to a community that refuses to let you hide behind your fear, and challenges you every day to show up as your best self (but more on that later as well, I have something coming up for you).

When I would sit with my fear, my pain, and ask the question why me, it occurred to me and accepted the fact that it had to be me. It was supposed to be me so that I could in all of my rebellious ways, stand up and be the one to show you what was possible for you.

If I had not experienced it firsthand, there will be no way that I could share with you from an authentic place that it’s possible to grow through your past pain, fears, and insecurities and become the woman you’ve always wanted to be.

It doesn’t matter when you come across this information. It can be transformative at any age. You could be in your 20s, you could be in your 30s, you could be in your 60s.

You know what, it doesn’t matter.

You can use this, and if you need help, I’m here for you, and I’m here for it all.

Until next time…

Dare to be happy in business and in love.

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3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear

PODCAST EPISODE № 36

3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear

by Anita Charlot

Listen to 3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear:

What You Learn:

Featured on the Show:

Episode Transcript

Enjoy the Show?

IF YOU LIKE IT, SHARE IT

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"Can He Handle Your Grind?"

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PODCAST EPISODE № 36

3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear

by Anita Charlot

Listen to 3 Ways to Step Out in Front of Fear:

What You Learn:

Featured on the Show:

Episode Transcript

Enjoy the Show?

IF YOU LIKE IT, SHARE IT

Get the free video training..."Can He Handle Your Grind?"

podcast

stay in touch

Get the free video training...
"Can He Handle Your Grind?"